Quotations
Funny

As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.

-Oscar Wilde

I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.

-Woody Allen

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.

-Yogi Berra

I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.

-Nikola Tesla

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

-Frank Sinatra

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

-Mark Twain

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.

-Mark Twain

To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.

-Benjamin Franklin

The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

-Ronald Reagan

He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.

-George Bernard Shaw

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