To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
Quotations
Funny
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
-Nikola Tesla
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
