This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
Quotations
Funny
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
-George Eliot
"Adam Bede"
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
