The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
