Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
Quotations
Funny
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
