Quotations
Funny

A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?

-Albert Einstein

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

-Mark Twain

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

-Mark Twain

I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.

-Woody Allen

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

-Mark Twain

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.

-Benjamin Franklin

He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.

-George Bernard Shaw

My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.

-Alexandre Dumas

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.

-Mark Twain

Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.

-Anonymous "The movie “Kinky Boots"

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