I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
Quotations
Funny
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
-George Bernard Shaw
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
