I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
-Nikola Tesla
Quotations
Funny
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
