Quotations
Funny

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

-Mark Twain

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.

-Benjamin Franklin

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

-Frank Sinatra

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.

-Winston S. Churchill

This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.

-Winston S. Churchill

I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.

-George Eliot "Adam Bede"

Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?

-George Bernard Shaw

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

-Mark Twain

A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.

-Anonymous

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.

-George Carlin

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