You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
Quotations
Funny
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
-George Eliot
"Adam Bede"
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
-Mark Twain
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
-Winston S. Churchill
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
