Quotations
Funny

A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.

-Anonymous

Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

-Benjamin Franklin

The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me

-Jarod Kintz "The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.

-George Carlin

Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.

-Mark Twain

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

-Frank Sinatra

My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.

-Alexandre Dumas

When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.

-Mark Twain

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

-Mark Twain

Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.

-Anonymous "The movie “Kinky Boots"

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