A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
Quotations
Funny
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
-Mark Twain
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
