A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Quotations
Funny
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
-Jarod Kintz
"The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."
