When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
-Anonymous
"The movie “Kinky Boots"
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
-Wilson Mizner
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
