Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
Quotations
Funny
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
-Jarod Kintz
"The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
-Winston S. Churchill
