When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
-Nikola Tesla
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
