A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
Quotations
Funny
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
-Jarod Kintz
"The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
-George Eliot
"Adam Bede"
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
-Winston S. Churchill
