Quotations
Funny

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

-Mark Twain

Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.

-Anonymous "The movie “Kinky Boots"

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.

-Mark Twain

TV is chewing gum for the eyes.

-Frank Lloyd Wright

A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.

-Anonymous

A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?

-Albert Einstein

A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

-Mark Twain

My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.

-Alexandre Dumas

Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

-Benjamin Franklin

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