The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
