When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
"Epigrams of a Cynic"
Quotations
Funny
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
-Wilson Mizner
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
-Winston S. Churchill
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
-Jarod Kintz
"The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
