I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
Quotations
Funny
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
-Wilson Mizner
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
