Quotations
Funny

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.

-Ambrose Bierce "Epigrams of a Cynic"

Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.

-Wilson Mizner

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.

-George Bernard Shaw

As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.

-Oscar Wilde

Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.

-Oscar Wilde

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.

-Winston S. Churchill

The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me

-Jarod Kintz "The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

-Frank Sinatra

The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

-Ronald Reagan

I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.

-Winston S. Churchill

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