Quotations
Funny

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.

-Mark Twain

To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.

-Benjamin Franklin

This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.

-Winston S. Churchill

I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.

-Winston S. Churchill

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.

-Yogi Berra

A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?

-George Bernard Shaw

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.

-Ambrose Bierce

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

-Oscar Wilde

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.

-Winston S. Churchill

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