I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
Quotations
Funny
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
