Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
Quotations
Funny
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
-George Eliot
"Adam Bede"
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
