I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
-Anonymous
"The movie “Kinky Boots"
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
-Mark Twain
