Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
-Anonymous
"The movie “Kinky Boots"
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
