Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
