The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
-Mark Twain
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
