Quotations
Funny

I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.

-Nikola Tesla

The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me

-Jarod Kintz "The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."

The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

-Ronald Reagan

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

-Frank Sinatra

When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.

-Mark Twain

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.

-Mark Twain

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

-Oscar Wilde

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.

-Albert Einstein

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

-Mark Twain

Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

-Benjamin Franklin

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