Quotations
Funny

As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.

-Oscar Wilde

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.

-George Carlin

I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.

-Alfred North Whitehead

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.

-Winston S. Churchill

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

-Mark Twain

When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.

-Mark Twain

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

-Mark Twain

Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.

-Wilson Mizner

I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.

-Nikola Tesla

Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.

-Anonymous "The movie “Kinky Boots"

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