When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
-Winston S. Churchill
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
