When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
-George Eliot
"Adam Bede"
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
