Quotations
Funny

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

-Mark Twain

Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.

-Anonymous "The movie “Kinky Boots"

TV is chewing gum for the eyes.

-Frank Lloyd Wright

I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.

-Nikola Tesla

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.

-Mark Twain

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

-Mark Twain

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

-Oscar Wilde

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.

-Albert Einstein

A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.

-Voltaire

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