Quotations
Funny

Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.

-Oscar Wilde

I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.

-Alfred North Whitehead

A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.

-Anonymous

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.

-Ambrose Bierce

There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

-Mark Twain

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.

-Ambrose Bierce "Epigrams of a Cynic"

A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.

-Benjamin Franklin

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

-Mark Twain

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