The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
