I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
-George Eliot
"Adam Bede"
Quotations
Funny
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
-Mark Twain
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
