Quotations
Funny

Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.

-Mark Twain

The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.

-Voltaire

Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.

-Anonymous "The movie “Kinky Boots"

Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.

-Mark Twain

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.

-Winston S. Churchill

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

-Mark Twain

I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.

-George Eliot "Adam Bede"

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.

-Mark Twain

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

-Frank Sinatra

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.

-Mark Twain

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