Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
-Wilson Mizner
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
