A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Quotations
Funny
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
-Jarod Kintz
"The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
-Wilson Mizner
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
