Quotations
Funny

I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.

-George Eliot "Adam Bede"

When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.

-Mark Twain

Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

-Benjamin Franklin

Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.

-Anonymous "The movie “Kinky Boots"

Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.

-Mark Twain

Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.

-Mark Twain

I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.

-Nikola Tesla

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.

-Winston S. Churchill

A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.

-Anonymous

A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?

-Albert Einstein

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