When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
-Mark Twain
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
-Anonymous
"The movie “Kinky Boots"
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
