Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
-Wilson Mizner
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
"Epigrams of a Cynic"
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
