You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
Quotations
Funny
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
-George Bernard Shaw
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
