Quotations
Funny

The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

-Ronald Reagan

I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.

-Nikola Tesla

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.

-George Carlin

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.

-Benjamin Franklin

Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.

-Oscar Wilde

This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.

-Winston S. Churchill

I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.

-Winston S. Churchill

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.

-Mark Twain

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.

-Yogi Berra

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

-Mark Twain

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