Quotations
Funny

I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.

-Winston S. Churchill

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.

-Yogi Berra

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

-Mark Twain

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

-Oscar Wilde

Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.

-Wilson Mizner

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.

-Ambrose Bierce "Epigrams of a Cynic"

I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.

-Woody Allen

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.

-Benjamin Franklin

The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

-Ronald Reagan

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

-Mark Twain

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