The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
Quotations
Funny
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
-George Bernard Shaw
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
