Quotations
Funny

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.

-Mark Twain

To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.

-Benjamin Franklin

A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.

-Nikola Tesla

The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.

-Voltaire

I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.

-George Eliot "Adam Bede"

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.

-Winston S. Churchill

Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.

-Wilson Mizner

TV is chewing gum for the eyes.

-Frank Lloyd Wright

Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.

-Ambrose Bierce

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