Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
Quotations
Funny
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
-Mark Twain
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
-George Bernard Shaw
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
