When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
Quotations
Funny
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
-George Bernard Shaw
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
