Quotations
Funny

The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.

-Voltaire

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.

-George Bernard Shaw

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

-Oscar Wilde

A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.

-Anonymous

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

-Mark Twain

This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.

-Winston S. Churchill

He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.

-George Bernard Shaw

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.

-Mark Twain

There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

-Oscar Wilde

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