Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
-Jarod Kintz
"The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
