This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
Quotations
Funny
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
