As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
Quotations
Funny
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
"Epigrams of a Cynic"
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
