The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
Quotations
Funny
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
-Wilson Mizner
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
-Nikola Tesla
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
-Jarod Kintz
"The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
