I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
Quotations
Funny
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
-Mark Twain
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
