Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
Quotations
Funny
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
