The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
-Anonymous
"The movie “Kinky Boots"
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
-Mark Twain
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
-George Eliot
"Adam Bede"
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
