Quotations
Funny

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

-Mark Twain

When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.

-Mark Twain

Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?

-George Bernard Shaw

I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.

-George Eliot "Adam Bede"

Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.

-Mark Twain

The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

-Ronald Reagan

He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.

-George Bernard Shaw

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.

-Yogi Berra

Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.

-Anonymous "The movie “Kinky Boots"

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

-Oscar Wilde

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