Quotations
Funny

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

-Frank Sinatra

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

-Mark Twain

There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.

-Mark Twain

He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.

-George Bernard Shaw

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.

-Ambrose Bierce

I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.

-Woody Allen

Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.

-Anonymous "The movie “Kinky Boots"

A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.

-Anonymous

The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

-Ronald Reagan

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