He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
-George Bernard Shaw
Quotations
Funny
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
-Jarod Kintz
"The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
