When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
-George Eliot
"Adam Bede"
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
-George Bernard Shaw
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
