A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
Quotations
Funny
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
