I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
