When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
Quotations
Funny
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
-Mark Twain
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
