The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
Quotations
Funny
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
-Wilson Mizner
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
"Epigrams of a Cynic"
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
-George Eliot
"Adam Bede"
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
