Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
-Winston S. Churchill
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
-Anonymous
"The movie “Kinky Boots"
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
-George Bernard Shaw
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
