Quotations
Funny

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.

-Ambrose Bierce "Epigrams of a Cynic"

I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.

-Winston S. Churchill

The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

-Ronald Reagan

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

-Mark Twain

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.

-Ambrose Bierce

As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.

-Oscar Wilde

My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.

-Alexandre Dumas

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

-Mark Twain

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