I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
-Anonymous
"The movie “Kinky Boots"
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
