Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
