I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
