Quotations
Funny

The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.

-Voltaire

Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?

-George Bernard Shaw

TV is chewing gum for the eyes.

-Frank Lloyd Wright

I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.

-Alfred North Whitehead

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

-Mark Twain

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.

-Albert Einstein

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

-Frank Sinatra

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.

-Mark Twain

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