The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
Quotations
Funny
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
-Nikola Tesla
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
-Anonymous
"The movie “Kinky Boots"
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
-Mark Twain
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
