When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
Quotations
Funny
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
-Mark Twain
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
-Nikola Tesla
