Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
Quotations
Funny
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
