Quotations
Funny

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

-Mark Twain

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.

-Benjamin Franklin

TV is chewing gum for the eyes.

-Frank Lloyd Wright

I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.

-Alfred North Whitehead

The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me

-Jarod Kintz "The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."

A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.

-Wilson Mizner

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.

-Mark Twain

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