I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
Quotations
Funny
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
-Anonymous
"The movie “Kinky Boots"
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
