Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
-Wilson Mizner
