When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
