Quotations
Funny

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

-Mark Twain

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.

-Winston S. Churchill

The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me

-Jarod Kintz "The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."

I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.

-George Eliot "Adam Bede"

I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.

-George Carlin

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.

-Mark Twain

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.

-Mark Twain

He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.

-George Bernard Shaw

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