Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
Quotations
Funny
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
-Jarod Kintz
"The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
