When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
"Epigrams of a Cynic"
Quotations
Funny
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
