Quotations
Funny

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.

-Yogi Berra

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

-Oscar Wilde

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

-Mark Twain

Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.

-Wilson Mizner

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.

-Benjamin Franklin

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

-Mark Twain

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

-Mark Twain

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.

-Mark Twain

Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.

-Anonymous "The movie “Kinky Boots"

There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

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