To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
Quotations
Funny
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
-Mark Twain
