When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
Quotations
Funny
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
-Winston S. Churchill
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
