When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
"Epigrams of a Cynic"
Quotations
Funny
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
-Winston S. Churchill
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
