Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
Quotations
Funny
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
-Nikola Tesla
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
