Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
Quotations
Funny
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
