Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
-Jarod Kintz
"The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
-George Bernard Shaw
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
-Anonymous
"The movie “Kinky Boots"
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
