I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
-George Eliot
"Adam Bede"
Quotations
Funny
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
-Mark Twain
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
