When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
-Jarod Kintz
"The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
-Wilson Mizner
