A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
Quotations
Funny
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
-Mark Twain
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
