When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
-Ambrose Bierce
Quotations
Funny
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
