Don’t be jealous if I spend 50% of my time with you and 50% of my time with others, because you get 100% of 50%, while all the others have to share that other 50%. This is the speech I’ve prepared to tell my wife in the future, when I’m spending a majority minus one percent of my time with my clones.
The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding.
-Oscar Wilde
The desire to get married is a basic and primal instinct in women. It's followed by another basic and primal instinct: the desire to be single again.
-Nora Ephron
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
-Rita Rudner
By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.
-Socrates
A man in love is incomplete until he is married. Then he's finished.
-Zsa Zsa Gabor
Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.
-Groucho Marx
If you both care for each other more than you care for yourself, your marriage will endure all.
-Lisa Tawn Bergren
Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.
-Henny Youngman
Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Ivan Doig
