Quotations
Mark Twain

God: The most popular scapegoat for our sins.

God

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.

Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want.

The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.

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