Quotations
Mark Twain

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

God: The most popular scapegoat for our sins.

God

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.

Civilization is the limitless multiplication of unnecessary necessities.

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

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