Quotations
Mark Twain

In religion and politics people’s beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second-hand



The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.

God: The most popular scapegoat for our sins.

God

When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.

I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want.

Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.

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