It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.
It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
Be good and you will be lonesome.
