Quotations
Mark Twain

I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want.

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.

In religion and politics people’s beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second-hand



Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

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