Quotations
Mark Twain

I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want.

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.

When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.

In religion and politics people’s beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second-hand



I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.

Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.

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