Quotations
Mark Twain

The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.

God: The most popular scapegoat for our sins.

God

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

Age

Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.

I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.



Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.

Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.

Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

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