Quotations
Funny
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
- Winston S. Churchill
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
- George Bernard Shaw
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
- Mark Twain
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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