The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.
It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.
Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
What a wee little part of a person's life are his acts and his words! His real life is led in his head, and is known to none but himself.
You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want.
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
Be good and you will be lonesome.
I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.
Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
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