Just when I found out the meaning of life, they changed it.
Religion is like a pair of shoes.....Find one that fits for you, but don't make me wear your shoes.
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.
Religion is just mind control.
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
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