Quotations
Funny
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
- Voltaire
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
- Albert Einstein
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
- Oscar Wilde
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
- Alexandre Dumas
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