Quotations
Funny
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
- Jarod Kintz
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
- Mark Twain
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
- Mark Twain
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