Quotations
Funny
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
- Alexandre Dumas
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
- Wilson Mizner
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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