Quotations
Funny
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
- George Bernard Shaw
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
- Frank Sinatra
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
- Albert Einstein
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
- Nikola Tesla
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
- Mark Twain
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde
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