Quotations
Funny

Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain

Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde

A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
- Albert Einstein

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain

When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
- Mark Twain

A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
- Winston S. Churchill

The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
- Voltaire

To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin

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