Quotations
Funny
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
- George Eliot
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
- Alexandre Dumas
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
- Winston S. Churchill
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
- Wilson Mizner
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
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