Quotations
Funny
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
- Jarod Kintz
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
- Albert Einstein
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
- Oscar Wilde
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
- George Eliot
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