Quotations
Funny
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
- Wilson Mizner
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
- Voltaire
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
- George Eliot
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
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