Quotations
Funny
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston S. Churchill
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
- George Bernard Shaw
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
- Winston S. Churchill
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
- Nikola Tesla
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
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