Quotations
Funny

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw

A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
- Albert Einstein

The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
- Voltaire

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain

To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin

I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
- Nikola Tesla

Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain

There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan

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