Quotations
Funny
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
- Albert Einstein
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
- Frank Sinatra
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
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