Quotations
Funny
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
- Albert Einstein
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
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