Quotations
Funny
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
- Mark Twain
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
- George Bernard Shaw
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
- Oscar Wilde
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
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