Quotations
Funny
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
- George Bernard Shaw
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
- Winston S. Churchill
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
- Mark Twain
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