Quotations
Funny
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
- Mark Twain
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
- Wilson Mizner
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
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