Quotations
Funny
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
- Nikola Tesla
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
- Oscar Wilde
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
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