Quotations
Funny
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
- Alexandre Dumas
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston S. Churchill
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
- Oscar Wilde
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
- George Bernard Shaw
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