Quotations
Funny
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
- Oscar Wilde
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
- Mark Twain
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
- Winston S. Churchill
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
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