Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
- Frank Sinatra
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
- Winston S. Churchill
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
- Jarod Kintz
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
- Nikola Tesla
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
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