Quotations
Funny
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
- Winston S. Churchill
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
- Mark Twain
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
- George Bernard Shaw
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
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