Quotations
Funny
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
- George Eliot
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
- Wilson Mizner
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
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