Quotations
Funny
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
- Voltaire
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
- Wilson Mizner
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
- Oscar Wilde
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
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