Quotations
Funny
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
- Frank Sinatra
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
- Mark Twain
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
- Nikola Tesla
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
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