Quotations
Funny
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
- George Bernard Shaw
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
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