Quotations
Funny
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
- Frank Sinatra
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
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