Quotations
Funny

Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain

Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde

My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
- Alexandre Dumas

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
- Mark Twain

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
- Winston S. Churchill

I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen

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